My waist bead body is my business.
Hello Queens! Happy 1st of the month! I pray that July is a month of healing, transformation and restoration. Especially because this month is very difficult for me for those who do not know I lost my parents in July, 25 years ago when I was a baby and I am struggling with this loss until this day but I am taking it day by day. One way for me to get back into healing is by taking care of myself because its been hard for me to deal with this time of year before in the past but this year I would like to overcome it the best way I can and I have a few ways I would like to do that. For one, I’ve been writing a book about my life as a healing process for me and I can definitely say it has been working so far. I also wanted to start going to the gym frequently because I have gained a lot of weight due to quarantine and I personally do not have an issue with my weight gain. However, it did bother me when some one asked me if I was pregnant. I honestly felt insulted because my first thought was “And if I was?” which is exactly what I said. I didn’t say no or deny it because in reality it is nobody’s business even if I was pregnant which I am not. His response to that was “I was going to say if so I have baby name suggestions.” I instantly became annoyed and slightly disgusted by his tone for a few reasons:
My weight gain isn’t any body’s business but my own
Why do men feel it is appropriate to ask question in regards to things going on in OUR body?
Even if I was pregnant, why would that be a topic that should be up for discussion
I have an issue with a man feeling the need to voice their opinion on a woman’s personal body
My weight gain is a reflection of my body cycle change which should only be my concern.
Pregnant women should not have to disclose if they are pregnant because it is their own body.
Even though I am not pregnant, I was offended. I wanted to share in this blog that my waist bead body is my business and your body is your business too. Do not let men or people in general speak to you about your body unless you have a personal relationship with that person and it is permissible other than that, my body. my business. Also I will be hitting the gym consistently this month not because of the rude remark about my body but simply because I want to be healthy and make better choices this month for my mental well being.
Another thing I wanted to mention is men speaking on my body not about my weight gain but just in general. Sometimes, we are not able to control how men perceive women especially me. Men may perceive me in more ways than sexually but than others are only capable of perceiving women in a sexual way. As a survivor of sexual abuse, I am more aware when I am being perceived sexually by other men but it is not always easy for me to deal with so I would avoid it if I can. However, you cannot avoid it because men will always be sexually attracted to women and the waist beads have been proven to be used for sexual pleasure and experiences but for right now that is not it for me.
My waist beads are a part of my body and I am single. Once I marry someone than I will be sharing my body and soul with someone else but until then as of right now I am single and my body belongs to no one. Even if I get married, my body still belongs to me but I’m choosing to share it with my partner. My waist beads body belongs to me, myself and I. Therefore, I do not want any man feeling comfortable asking personal questions about a body that does not belong to him. As for me working out, I am doing my workout routines so I can live a healthier better life for myself and no one else. I actually do not have a problem with my weight gain at all but I have not been working out as much and I know that. I am responsible for my body therefore I will be sure to take care of it as needed and would prefer if men kept their thoughts to themselves.
What do you think about this?
I would love to hear your thoughts!
Comment below
-Malon Mahotiere