Fathers Day and Juneteenth recap: Transition and change

Hello Queens and Kings! Over the weekend, I celebrated with some very fine young men in support of RX-Elites Barbershop in Atlanta. The owner, Cory is a good friend of mine. It even feels weird to label him as a “friend” he is more like a big brother to me. He has helped me so much in my professional career. For those who do not know I am a licensed Master Cosmetologist in the state of Georgia. Although waist beads actually was the first thing I started creating and selling that started my life as a young entrepreneur. At 17, I decided to start my career as a hairstylist. When I got my license at 25, I decided to make my transition as a barber stylist. That is when I met Cory along with a lot of other male barber friends and a few females also who I love dearly. For the past couple of years on Fathers Day, I don’t know how to properly address all the emotions that I feel. There has definitely been some depressing Father Days for me because not having my father in my life has been a very prominent disadvantage especially considering who my father was. Not to mention, the emotional turmoil that I experience as a result of his absence. I wish I could speak to my father right now. I realize not having him in my life as a young girl didn’t feel as bad as it does now as a young woman. Sometimes I feel very lost and misguided. Not to mention the energetic pattern of toxic and abusive men that would keep entering my life. I remember being in certain toxic relationships. I would think to myself “If my father was here right now, what would he think of me being with a man like this?” Unfortunately we cannot live in the past. I’ve accepted the reality of my father being gone. It was not an easy thing to accept but acceptance in any form will get you closer to healing than denial or delusion. Once I got to the point where I could accept my fathers death, I started looking for ways to heal from the reality I was living. Acceptance is the first step, the next step is energy healing. Healing those energetic wounds caused by abandonment, grief, and childhood trauma. I have been on this healing journey for the past 5 years. I have made tremendous change but I have to be honest and say that I still experience depression from time to time. Mainly because of my current situation. Unfortunately I experienced an apartment fire in December 2021. I was not expecting to go into 2022 being homeless again. I have been struggling with homelessness since age 3. When my father died in the accident, I was no longer able to have a stable family home. That life was short lived because I don’t even remember it. Although I did have visual memories of my parents before their passing, all of that was destroyed in the fire. Thank God nobody got hurt in the fire except my heart. I was very heartbroken by all the lost memories I had of my dad and all of his accomplishments. No amount of money could ever replace some of the things I lost. The biggest setback for me was the fact that once again, I am homeless and I felt unloved and unprotected. Living in Atlanta has not been the best experience for me. Although I am extremely grateful for everything I was able to start for myself when it comes to my business and becoming an entrepreneur and influencer. This week I am preparing to make my transition out of Atlanta. It is very bittersweet especially after having a great weekend celebrating with Cory and his friends. Atlanta can be a very toxic environment but you don’t realize it because we are always partying and having fun down here. It’s hard to acknowledge that you have any problems when you are too busy trying to have a good time. That is also a form of repressing and deflecting. You are not addressing your internal issues when you are trying to mask them with external factors. I am way too deep into my healing journey to not recognize when I am doing that. However sometimes it is good for you to go out and celebrate and enjoy yourself with good people and good energy on your healing journey. Now that the holiday is over and I am preparing to make my transition out of Atlanta I can’t help but think of my father and what his wishes may be for me as I take a leap of faith on this journey. Also the Juneteenth holiday that celebrates the freedom of enslaved black Americans being on Fathers Day was an alignment. There was something very therapeutic about Fathers Day this year. The black and African American community are starting to open their eyes to the influence and impact black and African American men have on our culture and society especially those who are fathers. I love my father dearly because he took care of his family. He loved children that was not his own. He helped out anyone who needed it beyond his family. Even though my father died when I was 1 year old and 6 months, I know how amazing he was despite my inability to recollect any memories. Energy does not lie and does not die even after death. I spent many months after the fire being depressed because I thought about my fathers life so much and all he did for others. I do not want to feel entitled in any way but I was so heartbroken at how discarded I felt after the fire. It seemed the only people willing to help me were complete strangers. I did not hear much from people that I know knew my father more than I did. With an exception of my family that live in Connecticut. They have been the only people since his death that have always been there for me and I love that about them. When I visited them last month, I felt at peace. I was happy to be around people who not only acknowledged me but my father as well. There is so much I want to say when it comes to how I feel emotionally about this but I will wrap up by saying this: I deserve a life where I am being loved and celebrated without any restraint or restrictions because I know that is how my father loved my mother and that is what I know he wants for me. Because I am an adult orphan, dating is not easy and people don’t talk about that enough. I am getting older and I want to have my own family one day, the right way. I would never want anyone especially the children I bear to have to live the life I was forced to live. I know my parents did not want to leave me on this earth alone, but the fact that I live that reality every day is not easy to connect with others who do not understand what that may be. Also people treat you differently because they feel you are not protected so you are more subjected to being attacked by others especially men. I could go on and on. I am making the conscious decision to leave Atlanta.

My father would be very proud of me for wanting better for myself because he was the exact same way. I do not deny how proud of me he is. I just wish he could be here to see it but I know he is still watching. He also wants me to live a happier life. A medium psychic recently shared a message to me from him. He says “Please don’t keep stressing about it. You’re going to ruin yourself. You don’t need to keep stressing about things. Everything is going to be fine. Your life is going to be wonderful. I will make sure it happens. Just don’t stress.”

Considering my circumstances I am currently facing its very hard not to stress after your apartment burns completely down with all your belongings and you are forced to be homeless again for the 5th time. For some reason I listened to the spiritual message from the medium. Anytime I feel myself getting overwhelmed or stressed out I just think of what my father said. It also gives me the biggest amount of hope and relief especially during a very emotionally distressful time. Thank you for letting me share! I hope you all had a wonderful Fathers Day weekend and Juneteenth weekend. As I prepare to leave, I will be reminiscing on the positive memories I had in Atlanta with people who love and support me unconditionally. When I get more stabilized I will be releasing my new line of jewelry for men in honor of my father Dr. Sauveur Mahotiere. Now men can join us on this journey towards energy healing. We all deserve to live a happier, healthy, healed life.

Happy Fathers Day to all the wonderful fathers in heaven and earth!

Love Always,

Malon Mahotiere